This post was provided by InnerDrive, a mental skills training company

How do we become better leaders? An effective leader is someone who can create an inspiring vision, motivate and inspire their team, manage the delivery of that shared purpose and then coach and improve that team in order to achieve that end goal. So what are the best leadership skills, and what are the keys to becoming a better leader?

1. UNDERSTANDING YOUR LEADERSHIP STYLE
According to research, there are loads of different leadership styles and they vary between men and women. However, 4 main styles have been commonly agreed. These four leadership styles include autocratic, democratic, laissez-faire and transformational. By finding out what type of leader you are, you will then be able to identify your strengths and areas in which you need to improve.

For more ideas on how to help your team members develop and improve, have a look at our page on how to improve metacognition.

Autocratic

This leadership style includes, close supervision, lack of input from followers, complete control and solo decision-making.

Democratic

This leadership style includes, shared decision-making responsibilities, social equality, creativity and high engagement from group members.

Laissez-faire

This style includes, little direction from the leader, lots of freedom for group members, team members are responsible for making all decisions and a great deal of autonomy.

Transformationala-better-leader

People who have this leadership style are often described as energetic, passionate, enthusiastic, trustworthy, creative and intelligent.

A more in-depth description of these styles can be found here.

2. Be a role model

This doesn’t necessarily mean leading from the front, as keeping a watchful eye from a distance can allow your team to develop their own forms of leadership and management strategies. This point refers to the way you, as the leader, exemplify your behaviours and characteristics for your team to follow. Your actions can have a profound impact on the behaviours of your team. Research has shown that by showing your organisation what is possible, a leader can empower them to develop their own skill sets.

3. Be authentic

Being authentic in your approach to leadership provides your group with a true understanding of who you are as a person, away from your professional role. Research has shown that by doing what is promised, being visible to your organisation and being honest helps manifest a sense of trust within the group you’re leading. Be true to your values and in doing so, your team can understand the direction you want to take them in.

4. Listen to, and communicate with, your team

Research has shown that non-verbal cues like body language, facial expressions, eye movement and hand motions are an important form of communication. Matching your non-verbal cues to your actions and words can help with authenticity.

Whilst verbally and non-verbally communicating with your team, it is also important to listen to what they have to offer. Be an active listener, in doing so approach conversations with concentration and regard for the speaker’s thoughts and considerations. Likewise, studies have shown that skilled listeners also pick up on the speaker’s underlying thoughts and concerns by tuning into their non-verbal cues, showing genuine care for the person’s feelings and morale.

5. Motivate your team

Leaders can motivate people in various ways, but by making sure the individuals inside the team understand that their investment of time and effort is something worthwhile, and can encourage the desired actions. Evidence indicates that this can be done by providing recognition and praise, offering rewards, inclusion and by being passionate.

Final thought

John F. Kennedy once said, “Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other.” Highlighting how leadership is a constant learning process and that it can most definitely be taught. Anyone can become a great leader as long as you are willing to listen and learn.

What to do after a tough loss? Ask these three simple questions after a tough loss and/or a disappointing performance What went well?What needs work? What did we learn?

By John  O’Sullivan, Founder of Changing the Game Project,   a site that is your one stop shopping for  the latest and greatest information, research, and best practices regarding high performance, motivation, Long Term Athletic Development, fitness, nutrition, college recruiting, and more.“Do you want to win every game you play for the rest of your life?”

That was a question that Olympic gold medalist and current USA Women’s Volleyball team head coach Karch Kiraly asked his team as they prepared for the 2014 World Championships.

“Because we can,” he told them. They could schedule easy opponents, play overmatched foes, and play in friendly instead of hostile environments. But then what? Would they be challenged? Would they be pushed? Would they be bored? Of course. Deep down no one wants to win all the rest of their games. You must lose sometimes, and they did as they prepared in 2014..

Kiraly’s team went on to claim the World Championship, and is a favorite for gold in Rio this summer, because they continually challenge themselves. They lose sometimes, but they learn from losing. His question to his team is one our Changing the Game Project speakers ask parents all the time: “Do you want your kids to win all their games for the rest of their life?”

Of course the answer is no. We understand that winning is great, but losing and being challenged and pushed is where young athletes learn the most. We don’t want our kids to play all their games against overmatched teams, or in easy tournaments, because they would eventually get bored and quit. They want to be challenged. Here is the clincher, though.

They are OK with losing, and most kids understand it’s part of the process.

Sadly, many adults struggle with losing far more than their kids. Angry moms and dads berate their kids and officials from the sidelines, and on the ride home after games. Coaches yell and scream at athletes, or worse yet, don’t even let some kids play in matches because they fear losing. They use physical punishment (running, pushups, etc) when kids make technical errors, instead of teaching them. They scream for more effort from players who have given their all, but haven’t developed the technique and tactical ability to succeed.

When I suggest to these coaches that there is a better way, the response is predictable: “Life is tough, I’m not going to coddle these kids, I’m getting them ready for the real world.”

“Life is tough,” I respond, “and sports is a great way to teach kids to deal with challenging situations. But don’t you think it would be better for those kids to tackle those future difficult situations with a strong sense of self-confidence and belief, instead of thinking ‘last time we messed up we got screamed at’ or ‘I messed up and got benched?’’”

The response to my question is also predictable from most coaches that come from the “I have always done it this way, that’s how I was coached” camp: crickets, or at most a shrug and shake of the head.

As parents and coaches, we too often frame losing as something to always be feared and avoided at all costs. When we do this, we don’t prepare kids for future success; we prepare them for future anxiety (we also encourage cheating but that is a whole different article).

There is a better way. Losing can be something positive if framed correctly, especially for young kids.

Trust me, I understand how frustrating losing feels, as both a parent and a coach. I want my kids to be successful, and I certainly want my teams to play hard and get some results for their efforts. I am disheartened when I see the goals pouring in our goal, and my athletes struggling. I want to fix it. I want to make it better. I want to feel better after the game, and usually venting my frustration makes me feel better. But what about the kids? Does it make them better?

There is a better way. It works incredibly well when I am coaching a team, and it works great with my own kids to help after a tough loss.

I ask three simple questions after a tough loss and/or a disappointing performance:

What went well out there?

What needs work?

Why are we better because we lost today?

I learned these three questions from my great friend Dr. Jerry Lynch, author of the outstanding new book Let Them Play: The Mindful Way to Parent Kids for Fun and Success in Sports. Dr. Lynch has been part of over 30 national and world champion teams on the collegiate and professional level, so when he makes a recommendation on how to help a team or athlete, I tend to listen. Here is why these questions work.

What went well out there?

After a loss, many athletes are expecting to get dressed down. They usually feel lousy about a loss, just as parents and coaches do. But they didn’t do everything wrong. Some good things happened, and this question lets players know that we saw some good things. They scored some goals, made some good tackles, and had some great combination plays. Instead of only focusing on what went wrong, this question helps kids understand that they are doing a lot right. This helps them feel like they are continually improving, and that the process has space for both success and disappointment. Better yet, research shows that the most effective leaders and teams give nearly six positive comments for every negative one. It is never all bad, so be sure that your kids never forget that by first asking “what went well?”

What needs work?

Obviously, we lost, so not everything went well. But this is sports, there is always something that needs work, right? We often underemphasize “what needs work” when we win, and overemphasize it when we lose, so asking this in both cases provides balance. We have acknowledged the good, now let’s acknowledge the things we have to put in some extra work on. Did we defend well as a team? How is our fitness? Are we working hard for each other offensively? As a parent, you can ask your son or daughter what things they can focus on in training that week, or better yet, what can they accomplish outside of practice to improve their play. Athletes must be prepared to receive critical feedback from their coaches regardless of the result, and asking them to identify what needs to be worked on is far more effective than simply lecturing them.

Why are we a better team/athlete because we lost today?

This question is the clincher. Development is a process. It is a marathon, not a sprint. There are going to be ups and downs, and the critical thing is we continually learn and improve. The outcome of the competition cannot be changed, but we can influence the outcome of our next event, and our preparation for it. This question helps athletes frame the loss, and take ownership of the training and preparation for the next match. For example, your team might say “We are better because we learned that when we don’t defend as a team, we get scored on a lot. We need to focus on team defending if we are going to be successful next match.” Your athlete might say “I am better because I learned that against a good team, I have to play a lot quicker, so I will be focused on that in practice this week.” This question opens the door to a path forward, helps them move on from the loss, and gives them ownership over their preparation for the upcoming contest.

Three simple, magical questions that turn losing moments into learning moments:

What went well?

What needs work?

Why are we a better team because we lost today?

When a coach asks his or her team these three questions, losing is no longer a scary moment; it becomes a teachable moment. You build a stronger connection with your athletes, you put the loss in the past, and you get your athletes refocused on the process of getting better. Most importantly, you demonstrate that you are in this together. Your athletes will love you for it.

Parents, when you ask your kids these three questions, you remind them that it’s the process, not just the outcome, that matters. You help them take ownership of their improvement, and focus on both their strengths and weaknesses. You also let them know that you are in it with them, whether its good, its bad, or it’s ugly.  It lets them know that you don’t simply love watching them win, but that you love watching them play!

Next time your team is loses, take a deep breath, and ask the three magic questions. You will be glad you did.

And so will your kids.

Coach Sullivan is offering a FREE video series which is part of his Coaching Mastery program which includes motivational and team building techniques used by some of the top coaches in the world. To gain access to his free video series click the link below or the image at the left.

Coaching Mastery

In order to be successful coaches must do more than accentuate the positive. The must eliminate the negative. Here are some tips.

By Dawn Redd-Kelly

Being a great head coach means success in competition. I don’t know that we coaches can be successful if we don’t manage our team’s culture. While we certainly have to guide them toward aspirational team goals and show them a template of what a winning culture looks like…we also have to limit the influence of our team Debbie Downer.

How successful leaders eliminate the negative:

Bad practices. Not like, our practices in preparation for a competition, but the things we do all the time…the things that eventually become our culture. As Aristotle said, “we are what we repeatedly do”, and if we have an athlete who repeatedly displays poor behavior (without correction), then it could become contagious.

Stifling processes. Do you have athletes who don’t buy fully into your vision for the team? Those folks are stifling your ability to move the team forward. Does your team have a history of hazing newbies? That process will stifle your team’s ability to gel and compete in crunch time.

Nasty people. It’s easy to cut the athlete whose contribution your team won’t miss when they’re gone. But what if your nasty player is your best player? We’ve got to be willing to challenge that athlete’s view of how their teammates should be treated in order to save our team culture.

Negative beliefs. I think we all worry about the team cancer, the athlete who is killing your culture in the locker room and on the bus. But I think the person who doesn’t believe in the team’s success is equally bad. You know the one: “This team killed us last year”, “We don’t have a chance without our really good player who just got injured”, “There’s no way we can win playing this defense”. *sigh*
A great post over at Leadership Freak was the jumping off point for this post…check it out!

Are you tired of walking into practice and seeing lackluster effort from your players?  Have you had it with trying to get your female athletes to care about the team as much as you do??

Click here to find out more about Coach Dawn’s eBook: Motivating Female Athletes

Comes with a FREE PowerPoint presentation called Guarantee Your Success: Using John Wooden’s Pyramid of Success To Increase Your Team’s Cohesion.

Dr. Cory Dobbs

“It’s not enough to know how to lead; you need to know how to build leaders too.”

On a scale from one to ten, how important is having a positive culture to your team’s ability to reach its potential? When I ask coaches this question, most of them answer in the nines and tens. Even the most inexperienced of them agree that, like it or not, the team’s culture holds the key to a team’s capacity. Talent is the foundation for winning, but culture is the guiding force that determines a team’s potential.

Even the least talented team can enjoy its experience if it’s imbued with a positive and motivating culture. Let’s face it, only one team will win the conference championship. However, every team will rise to its capacity if its culture is carefully nurtured.

Think of culture like a vibrant and dynamic river. All rivers are powered by the volume of water, the pull of gravity, and the focus produced by a river’s banks. The volume of water comes from many small sources—tributaries—flowing in the same direction and landing in the river. Think of a team’s members as the many small sources, each contributing volume to the rush of the river that is the team’s culture. The pull of gravity provides force as the river rages toward its goal—the ocean. And just like the ocean, team’s pursue an ultimate goal—a desired end-state. The banks, like a team’s norms, provide boundaries that serve to concentrate and funnel the flow thereby giving the river more force and power. A team’s norms contribute to its social structure that like the river’s banks provides stability, direction, and intensity of organized effort.

Unfortunately, many teams are more like puddles or ponds than powerful rivers. They stop-short of reaching their capacity and the team experience becomes one of struggle, conflict, and dysfunction. The channeling effect of the river’s banks makes all the difference between a puddle and a vigorous and focused river.

So, how do you go about creating a high-performing team culture?

The golden rule of culture building is found in relationships. How team members interact and the kinds of relationships they form has everything to do with what kind of culture emerges, has everything to do with the emergence of trust, commitment, and individual and team performance. Much of the success of a team lies in the crafting of a sense of “us.” It lies in the norms, values and priorities that emerge to shape the shared understanding of “who we are.” A team’s norms channel the sum of all these forces.

Generally speaking, norms are shared standards that define what behaviors are acceptable and desired by a team’s members. They are informal “agreements,” not formal rules or policies. So much of how players see and interact with the social universe around them is shaped by norms which are developed, discovered, or invented aspects of daily situations.

Norms emerge and develop from individual behaviors that take place one-to-one, as well as team norms of one-to-many and many-to-many. Two players may have a relationship that includes good-natured ribbing of one another, while the ribbing might not be a desired behavior in a team meeting. Norms act as guidelines, embedded rules of behavior if you will, that inform behavior and expectations in interpersonal interactions.

In the scheme of the well-worn Tuckman’s five stages of a team—forming, storming, norming, performing, and adjourning—the norming stage occurs when conflict has been resolved and team unity and harmony emerge. Once the norming stage kicks into gear the aspirations of the team become visible and elicit inspiration. A team that has achieved a high degree of maturity relating to team norms is likely to have a strong culture, whereas an immature team—low agreement and adherence to team norms—is likely to have a weak culture. Simply said, norms are vital for developing a high-performing team culture.

STAGE 3: NORMING The Cohesion Stage

During this stage, team conflict and chaos subside as the team achieves a sense of cohesion. When the team reaches this stage, team members feel a sense of unity and responsibility to other team members. Encouragement and acknowledgement of individual and team successes are the norm and commitment to team goals begins to take shape. A collective identity materializes. Close relationships will bring trust allowing team leaders to offer team members more constructive feedback.

Team leaders should know that their teammates might be asking themselves:

Do my teammates appreciate me for who I am and what I contribute?
What is my role on the team?
Do my teammates value me as a member of this team?
Who is committed to our team’s mission and goals?

During the norming stage team leaders might:

Assess progress toward team cohesion and team goals.

Identify and find ways to break down “new” barriers that are limiting commitment to each other and the team’s goals.

Keep team members focused on the team norms-those acceptable behaviors that are shared by the team’s members.

Revisit the “I can trust you when…” and “I can’t trust you when…” exercise.

*Passage taken from The Academy for Sport Leadership’s Teamwork Intelligence Workbook for Student-Athletes

Here’s a sample of norm statements:

▪We put team needs in front of our individual needs. Encourage members to learn new things.
▪We are committed to open, honest, and tactful dialogue. Everyone must speak and listen.
▪We support one another personally even when we are in conflict.
▪We challenge members to become a better person.
▪We respect one another at all times. Yet we see each others’ bad habits and help them to work on them.
▪Each of us is to be aware of our impact on the others and seek to ensure that our ideas, actions, and emotions challenge and support the team.
▪Each of us is responsible for understanding and managing our own behaviors and emotions in ways that support the team.
▪Each of us is responsible for holding each other accountable for owning our behaviors and emotions and to helping us grow and develop as responsible people.

Coaching for Leadership: How to Develop a Leader in Every Locker. ($24.99)

The Academy for Sport Leadership

About the Author

Dr. Cory Dobbs is a national expert on sport leadership and team building and is the founder of The Academy for Sport Leadership. A teacher, speaker, consultant, and writer, Dr. Dobbs has worked with professional, collegiate, and high school athletes and coaches teaching leadership as a part of the sports experience. He facilitates workshops, seminars, and consults with a wide-range of professional organizations and teams. Dr. Dobbs previously taught in the graduate colleges of business and education at Northern Arizona University, Sport Management and Leadership at Ohio University, and the Jerry Colangelo College of Sports Business at Grand Canyon University.

Dr. Dobbs recently joined Jamy Bechler on the “Success is a Choice” Podcast – hear his thoughts on team leadership and developing a leader in every locker here.